nicodiangeloisaqueer:

pruprupastapants:

ghostwriters-r-us:

sadbunnny:

sass-master-jack-frost:

snowyarcherprince:

book-harlot:

My gay brother walks into the room without a shirt on
Me: Hey topless
Him: Well you don’t have to rub it in that I’m single

Um…

IT TOOK ME A MINUTE.

I DONT GET IT

I DONT GET IT. Someone explain please :c

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I’M SOBBING VIOLENTLY

  • Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before driving back home.
  • Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
  • Virginians: I drove two hours and I've gone exactly ten feet because traffic on I-95 is backed up
  • #australians: i drove for nine hours #now i'm nine hours away from home #no one is here #the streets are empty #how did this happen #where has civilisation gone #i am alone in the universe #oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
  • Canadians: We left Toronto 2 days ago, We are still in Ontario, food is scarce. We are lost, soon we will have to eat each other to survive, oh wait there's a tims we're good.
  • Russians: I was in Yakutia, I drove for twenty eight hours, now I'm still in Yakutia, I travelled by train for 6 days, I'm still in Russia. Don't even try to leave Russia. Don't forget: you're here forever. Accept it and suffer.
  • The British: I drove for six hours, now I'm in the sea.
  • meanplastic:

    when you accidentally open your front camera

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    promiscuous-petal:

    enough about sex positions has anyone discovered a reading position which doesn’t get uncomfortable after 5 minutes

    brookietf:

    thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

    paperseverywhere:

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    And then I find out the fanfic hasn’t updated for over a year.

    WE CAN ALL RELATE TO THIS POST

    OH GOD THIS JUST STARTED HAPPENING TO MEEEEEE

    reapersun:

no cab would take him. not even…

    reapersun:

    no cab would take him. not even…

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    drakefan666:

    kiss me hard before you go, summertime sandler

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